Pain in Transitions... Completely Weirded Out...

 

 

As I layed in my bed last night I was just missing Peru. Thinking that right now I could be salsa dancing with some man that wants to have sex with me drinking a drink called Orgasms. Now I am jobless, watching reality TV, eating chocolate chip cookies and turkey leftovers. The only entertainment being shopping malls to drown in American consumerism.  My only companian being my mom's weener dog that has been overfed to the point where it looks like an italian sausage.

 

 

I am back in America and so far have been completely weirded out by the country of my birth. The first thing I noticed was that I do not have to say buenas dias/tardes/noches to everyone I meet. I have been trained at this as an automatic salutations, and now I feel rude. Next I realized that I do not have to automatically translate all of my thoughts. Then I noticed that when I wipe my ass I do not have to put toilet paper in the trash but can flush it down (this is after two months of being paranoid that I would forget and flush toilet paper down the toilet and it would overflood the bathroom and I would have to shamefully have to ask someone for help and well as clean it up).

 

 

It feels so strange. I knew that I would miss some things about Peru, but I was not expecting to feel like a fish out of water in my own country. And it is not just sadness. It is like I was immersed in a culture and then have been snapped back into reality. Like I was in a dream that was my whole life for a significant amount of time, and now I have been dumped someplace and jolted awake.  There are streets I will never walk down again. Places I will never go again. People I will never see again. After they were all part of my daily experience. They are part of my lifelong memories. And I will never see them again. Peru was my whole life - and I will never have that experience again. When you live someplace a certain amount of time, you begin weaving the fabric of life, and now there is just ripped fringe on a beautiful and colorful fabic.

 

 

No one prepares you for this. But as in all things, there is pain in transition. So I will eat my leftover turkey and be thankful for my lifelong memories, as I wait for the longing to pass. And move on to the rest of my life. And to finding a damn job.

 

 

Also, I remind myself to the feeling that I had on the flight back. Happiness. Overwheling happiness to be home.

 

 

E

 

Leaving Cusco...

 

As I prepare to leave Cusco I wonder what this trip has meant. Many people have asked me was it everything I thought it would be. The answer is no and yes. Before I came to Peru I was in this almost euphoric state. I was so happy. Living my life. I had just quit my job and was actively pushing through to a different stage in my life. It felt good. It felt wonderful. It felt like I was the captain of my own dreams. Like the world was at my fingertips and all  I had to do was be about it. I was almost embarrassed by the extent of my happiness. I felt like one of those couples making out in the middle of the street with the joy of their love, where everyone is staring at them with disgust and to go get a damn room.

 

 

I have done everything I have wanted to in Peru. But if I had to be honest, that euphoric feeling is gone. I am still happy and amazed, but I am not floating. This does not mean that the lessons and quest are any less. I wanted to challenge myself. I did. I wanted to see a different part of the world. I did. I wanted to be outside my comfort zone. I did. I wanted to learn new things. I did. I wanted to show myself that for the rest of my life it I dreamed it I could do it. I did. When I was in my state of euphoria, one thing I prayed for was that when things get hard, which they inevitable will becuase that is life, that I would remember that feeling and continue to be thankful. I am.

 

 

So I am here, in my last few hours in Cusco. Tired, not finished pack thou its 2am and I have an early morning flight, and still amazed that I ever even thought about coming or even made it. I have met some great people. Seen some beautiful things. And I am at the point where I will miss it. Where the thought of staying longer is a real consideration. But I must go. I have too many new chapters to write. And plus, I'm about to have my momma's cooking. What in this entire world can make up for that?

 

 

E

 

 

 

Lists...

Things I miss about America

• Mac and cheese
• Being able to drink tap water without having to take antobiotics for a week
• Heated buildings
• Momma's cooking
• My nephew
• Men that are taller then me
• Eating a lot of vegtables and fruit
• Related to point above, pooping right because I am eating enough  vegtables and fruit
• Brunches with unlimited mimosas.
• Scratch that - just breakfast in general that is not just bread.
• My friends.
• Being with people that know your whole insides.
• Going out to concerts for $5 in NYC.
• Museums that are bigger then my NYC apartment
• Speaking "slang" - when I say 'c'mon son' I want comprehension - there is a very important reason I'm saying it

 

 

 

 

Things I Like About Cusco

• Hot chocolate on the stove - that powder ish is not going to cut it anymore.  
• Walking around and always being surrounded by the natural wonder of mountains.
• Learning spanish and willing to sound stupid.
• Getting that look when your talking Spanish from a Peruvian that exist in every language - I didn't understand what the fuck you just said - with a slight a head cock and nose in stank face mode.
• Meeting new and inspiring people that I woulld have never met in not going outside my box.
• Literally being surrounded by some of the most profound history in the world.
• People pick their nose and pee on the street like it aint nothing . Respect the gangsta in it thou I won't shake your hand.
• Learning (and struggling) at salsa. Still need to work on mi tiempo but love leading how to follow. Life lessons in the beat.
• Being inspired to do new things that I never would have thought about before.
• Orgasms at the Nightsky. Nuff said. (even thou the ice from the drink currently got me on antibiotics)

(Damn son. A lot of this is about food.)

 

 

 

 

Ten Random things about Cusco

 

1. There are dogs on the street  like stray cats in Harlem (but they belong to ppl)
2. Related the previous point,  if your a female dog you are not living the good life becuase there strait dog orgies in the street and the male dogs are running a train on you (see photo)
3. Never pay more the 3 soles for a taxi anywhere, it is only about $.30 a sol - but you argue with the taxi driver if he wants to charges you 4 soles or even 3.50 soles and walk out if you need to.
4. People from Cusco don´t really smoke. the altitude here is high (and therefore less oxygen) so it doesnt make sense for their health.
5. Ramen noodles exist everywhere.
6. Coco-cola here is made with real sugar and not corn syrup and taste better.
7. No Peruvians own property on the Plaza de Aremes, which is the center tourist spot in Cusco.
8. Spring is as warm as it gets at a whooping 60 to 70 dregrees in the day and 40s at night, summer is the rainy season.
9. Women from here breastfeed on the street. I saw this lady sitting on the street with her child sucking on her goods using no hands just both of them sitting on the street - I would have taken a picture of it if I was disrespectful.
10. Cusco means the center of the world.

 

Wild Times at NightSky

I have not beeen visiting ruins lately. Or museums. Actually, I have been pretty pooped out. All I want is to rest. What I have been doing, however, is continuing my salsa classes at the NightSky. And after my salsa class me and the girls in the house I live in stay and chill and dance. Now, I have not drank since I have been to Cusco. But on this night I decided to try something callled "Orgasm in the NightSky." And let me tell you, thats exactly what it taste like. But with Baileys, Kalhua, ice cream,and chocolate - how can you go wrong? So we all have a round of Orgasms, including the teacher and the waiter who likes one of the girls so we get stronger drinks. Needless to say after all those orgasms we had a good night. Some highlights are the confusing the spanish word papi for the english word puppy, and now thats the waiters new nickname.  Joining someone else's birthday party including hitting the pinjata. Us stopping the salsa music in the club to play Tina Turner's "Private Dancer" to my dance instuctor and him not understanding a word of it or that its his new nickname. Singing our hearts out to U2, Bon Jovi, and Red Hot Chilli Peppers (I tried to put on JayZ but it wasn't working for the rest of the group). Dancing salsa on bar tops (it was only 30 seconds and after me a my private dancer realized we would fall to out deaths with another spin we stopped - don't judge me). Oh - and finding out that my instructor who I thought was gay for about six weeks is in fact straight (after of course I told one of the girls that he definitely does not want her becuase he has a boyfriend). I also don't think he understood that I have been telling people that he is gay. But we have clarified that the man he introduced as his boyfriend is security.

 

Sigh, good times.

 

 

Feeding baby monkeys in the zoo my granola bar..

My teacher brought me to the zoo. Thou small I had a lot of fun. It is located within the National University in Cusco. Here are some pics. One of the pictures is the monkeys trying thier hardest to reach for my Nature´s Valley Granola. Lol.

 

The Natural History Museum has a monkey that looks like its going to jump out the glass and eat you...

 

 We are learning the names of animals in my Spanish class, so my teacher decided to take me to the natural history museum. So far I have been disappointed by the museums in Cusco (its a small city and museums reflect that), but still managed to scrape up some excitement for the class trip. Like when you are a child, any chance not to be in class not learning more verb forms will make you happy no matter the excuse. The inner child still lives in all of us. Unless you are one of those go hard nerds, and we don´t like them anyways.

 

 

So, we go to the Museum of Natural History which literally can fit into the reception area of the Museum of Natural History in NYC and is located in a section of the Law School here in Cusco. Now, its no where as good as the museum in NYC but did have its hightlights. The dead stuffed amimals (taxidermy) were quite ugly to the point of distraction. It looked like it was going to attack you. I don´t know what the person who was making it was going thru- the animal didn´t do nothing to them. Then they had the remains of baby animals perserved in jars with some kind of mummy liquid which included a lamb with 8 legs and a deer with two heads. No, I am not lying. See photos.

 

Later on I was told that I am spoiled becuase I am used to going to grand museums. Well, my response is that if their is one thing to be boogie about it should be museums.

 

 

E

Birthday in Peru...

 

I decided that didn´t want to spend my birthday with random people who don´t really know me. I went to a spa and did the massage, mani, pedi thing. I woke up in a good mood, feeling blessed to be alive. Had a big breakfast with the Peru fam (I showed them how to make scrambled eggs and now they love me thou are also accusing me of making them fat). Then went off the be pampered.  

 

 

So I go to the spa to get my first ever massage. Ms Massues ask me to strip but leave on the undies. So here I am naked under a towel on my tummy. And then she pull down my undies a little lower and internally was like WHOA. But then decided to stop being stupid and let the woman do her job. She starts rubbing my head (which was a-ma-zing). I had to tell myself don´t drool don´t drool don´t drool. She worked out the midgets hanging around in my shoulders (which was a-ma-zing) and then I was like don´t fart don´t fart don´t fart. She started massage my arms and I was like don´t laugh don´t laugh don´t laugh (did not succeed - some of you know how ticklish I am). And then she was massage my lower back and a little bit the top of my butt and I was like don´t go near the crack don´t go near the crack don´t go near the crack. I will not be able to handle it. I´ll just have to get up and leave.

 

 

So my point is that I was spending so much time thinking that I did not fully relax. Thou the massage was very good and worked out some kinks in places i didn´t know I had (But when she got to my foot I almost kicked her in her face. You cant just touch a ticklish persons feet without warning.) Next time I will try to be in a better frame of mind and let go more. Thou my brother told me later on that if I didn´t drool then it wasn´t good enough.

 

 

After, I went to my Peru home and the family had a chocolate mocha cake for me. So sweet. They have such warmth and if I counldn´t have my family they are the next best thing. Mama Edith (house mother) has been nothing but warm and welcoming, making my Peru experience better.

 

 

But I am not going to lie. As the day went on I got really sad. I just missed my family and friends. I missed being around people who really know me, where no explainations or backstory is needed. But as soon as I called the fam my spirits were lifted. Just to hear their voices made me happy. Also, my friend sent me a picture of my fat child and that also made me happy (its so sad - I think I miss my cat more then some people :/... don´t judge me).  

 

 

That being said i am glad to have another year ahead of me. I don´t feel like I´m getting old at all. In fact, it´s the opposite. I have been so responsible these past few years, so grown up. Now I am getting to a stable place in my life where I can actually make decisions that make me happy. That´s a blessing. If you happy about the way you live your life and the decisions you make in your life then your age shouldn´t be a problem, becuase it is a reflection of your path. So far, I´m liking my journey.

 

 

So dueces and heres to being 25 and sexy with my strut.

 

 

E